The Weekly Shuffle: Even the Abysmal Get the Blues

I know there hasn't been a lot from me this week, it took a turn for the worse and I am struggling to keep my head above water, I know I'm in a bad spot when I start to not want to listen to music. So consider this a version of the weekly shuffle.  I'm going to find the first ten songs on shuffle mode that describe how I feel, its funny how most of the music I listen too would be described are dark or depressing but when I'm in a bad place I lose interest in it.

"You Fail Me" by Converge-the lyrics from Jacob aren't the most decipherable of his work but the feeling is there, the crunch of the guitar feels like the churn of my stomach so that resonates with me as well as the chords at the end feel like the perfect soundtrack.

"Undo You" by Katatonia-lyrically they are always in the ball park the airy ambiance of the intro is almost to happy, the "fate brings you down for the count /with broken promises to amount" line hits the spot well. this rides the fine line to being to happy but it's raining as the sun shines as I type this so that is fitting

"I Remember Nothing" by Joy Division- yeah I feel like hanging with Ian Curtis,  his almost out of key plea that we were strangers for way to long isn't how I feel I relate more to the guitar on though the me in my own world and you there beside hints at it.

"Where the Wild Roses Grow" By Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds-this is pretty soothing I guess I need to listen to more Nick Cave there is a reflective yearning to this one. The melancholy of this one is like a peaceful place I would like to get to though there is a desperation brought on by other life situations that makes this song sound almost too hopeful to the point of being unattainable. Gods grant me the serenity to be Nick Cave.

"Protect me From What I Want" by Placebo- this seems like a wide angle lens on life right now, the detached observer taking notes on the past and projecting them into the future, the guitar chords I hear in my head with out music so I can relate to this one , for some reason I have an urge to hear the o.k computer album, so that's a good sign there is something I would like to hear.

"the Oldness" by Xiu Xiu- yes this music is reading my mind, his tone of voice is how I feel, the lyrics are in question a little to vague, but I can relate to how they are delivered, when I was a teenager lyrics always had to be dead on like a diary, now i'm more empathetic.

" Hi " by Xiu Xiu, here is the resent turned in and cynical as I feel the jading of the lily gilding. The out look being fucked is what I get from this song, even though it's dancey as hell the fact my head isn't bobbing means I get it.

" I Remember Who You Are" by Swans- Normally Jarboe songs aren't my favorite but its really comparing George Harrison to John Lennon, though she came and went and they stayed Swans, this is on the more the glass is half full side to me, and the lyrics seem like words to live by. The you remain unchanged is sinister as change is need to thrive and being stuck and stagnant lead to death. The last verse to bittersweet for sure.

"Manifest Destiny" is PERFECT -  
  I don't have a reason to go back home

So what am I supposed to do?
I only know one place where I have to be
And it's gotta be with you
I'm on my way now
So you gotta help me out
You gotta make it out for me

How could we survive?
Yeah I'll think about the kids
Just let your speed arrive
Yeah don't worry about the rest

There is a fire that burns on my tongue
So what can I ever do?
I see them at you feeling your loss
And I wanna feel it too
I will find you and roll out the fire
So you gotta help me out
You gotta make it out for me

How could we survive?
Yeah just think about the kids
Just let your speed arrive
Yeah don't worry about the rest

More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/manifest_destiny_lyrics_zola_jesus.html
All about Zola Jesus: http://www.musictory.com/music/Zola+Jesus 

"lick the palm of the burning hand by "Zola Jesus- she is reading my email
I'm the only one that sticks aroundWhen they call your name out of a crowdAnd you say it don't hurt when I'm going aloneAnd you know it don't hurt but I keep it strongSo I don't try to goI just won't and you knowThe need to know it takes you overTakes you overThe need to grow it take you underTake you underIt bares the keeping of resistanceTo the listen again and againIt takes you over again and againIt takes you over[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/lick-the-palm-of-the-burning-handshake-lyrics-zola-jesus.html ]I'm the only one that makes you stopAnd I know the plane is going downWhen you say you don't see the red in my eyesDo you really want to bring the fire outsideI don't want you to goLose my eyes I'll never showThe need to know it takes you overTakes you overThe need to grow it take you underTake you underIt bares the keeping of no resistanceTo the listen again and againIt takes you over again and againIt takes you over

Read more: ZOLA JESUS - LICK THE PALM OF THE BURNING HANDSHAKE LYRICS 

the Smiths ended up being  too happy for me, in reflecting there's is always the satisfaction in  fact that any good music they listen to is going to make them think of you , though I can't listen to Abigail right now as it was a car song but if i take the big pciture of everything into consideration car songs are small peas